Thursday, July 3, 2008

Here's the issue.

Obviously as you know, I love Joe. However, lately been having problems, as you would already know as well... I gave up on the situation and decided to just be his friend. then I went on a date with this guy Taylor, who I really like, and he likes me, and everything went really well with that. Well... I spent the night at my friend Katt's dad's apartment, with Joe and her last night. And suddenly, Joe had never been more honest or affectionate. Suddenly it seems like he wants me back, again. And today, he asked me to choose between him and Taylor. Here were my options.

Choose Taylor - Get to be with a boy I could potentially love, and be happy with, and lose Joe even as a friend.

Choose Joe- Lose a guy I could potentially fall head over heels for, and hope that maybe Joe will decide he wants to date me again, and wait until that happens.

Bare in mind, I still love Joe. But being with Taylor on our date, and earlier today made me incredibly happy, and.. he's an awesome kisser. [Sorry. xD]

Also, bare in mind, spending yesterday and part of today with Joe has made me just want to be with him again. I sent him a text after he had to leave this morning, that basically said, "You're smart, funny, gorgeous, amazing, perfect, and i miss you already." And he [a guy that hasn't responded to my texts and virtually never says anything showing he cares] replied with, "You're all that and a box of chocolates. I miss you too."

Yesterday went like this:
Date with Taylor.
He had to leave because he had lessons [vocal & guitar]
Met up with Joe.
I snuck away from the group and called Taylor.
Joe came out, and realized that I wasn't calling my mom and that it was Taylor.
He admitted that it made him really unhappy to know I was talking to another guy, romantically.
Joe and I drove to the park and talked, and everything got amazingly better.
Joe spent the night.
I woke up in Joe's arms, he cuddled with me the WHOLE night.
[Which he hasn't done in months, not since we were dating.]
Joe left for an orthodontist appointment really early.
Taylor came over.
I fondled Taylor.
Felt horrible about it.
Taylor left.
I called Joe, asking him to come over.
Joe came over.
Told Joe nothing about Taylor.
Joe asked me to choose one of them. =/
I told Joe I chose him.
When really. I don't know who I choose.

Fucking shit. =/

Taylor is a fucking amazing kisser. Hands down.
Gosh, I really like him. =[

But.. I really LOVE Joe. =/

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